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looking for my maori past  

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mariapia OWC
(@mariapia-owc)
Active Member

Is my case mission impossible?

My name is donna carlsson and my mother is white and father maori. i was born in australia and my father was never listed on my birt certificate. I was adopted by swedish parents. my mother is not to keen on talking about the past, i feel i have tried everything, last time i tried was last week. she lives in New Zealand and I have a big white family there.

is there anyone out there in cyberspace that has a successful story? any advice to give me? what can i do? what did you do? i know that there are family trees dna in america, is there any for maori ancestry in NZ?is dna registry a way to go? should i give up? can miracles still happen???

Living in a land ful of blonds and blue eys make me stand out just a little bit 🙂

Thank you all in advance.
best regards
donna carlsson

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 12:38 am
tane_ariki OWC
(@tane_ariki-owc)
Trusted Member

Kia Ora Donna Carlsson,

I don't know of any dna options for Maori in NZ or Australia.

I think the best option for you to pursue is to get your mother or her parents or some close siblings/relatives to tell you who your Maori father is. Although your mother feels hurt over something horrible that he probably did to her I too have had an experience where my own white mother tried to erase my identity by giving me a white name and tried to stop all communication between myself and my father - fortunately that failed completely. The reason why my mother did this is a mystery to me.

I wish you the best of luck.

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 1:58 pm
copycatdog OWC
(@copycatdog-owc)
Active Member

Tena Koe Mariapia,
I too come from a Pakeha family and decided to do my Whakapapa this time last year. Al I knew was my father's name. My father was Whangai by the Rickett's of Takahue, so that made it a bit harder. I've since found out that he was the son of a Pene. I made heaps of phone calls, googled, and read books to find my Whakapapa. My Whakapapa is now extensive and "divine intervention" did come in to it. Keep plugging on even though you over there and if you need any help, just holla.
Before I go, the Korero of the previous author (tiny ariki) he is only putting his own slight on things regarding why your father isn't named. On my birth cert. my father isn't named; didn't stop me. I wish you all the best.
Na Steve.

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 4:29 pm
tane_ariki OWC
(@tane_ariki-owc)
Trusted Member

Kia Ora Donna Carlsson,

Please don't misinterpret my words as casting a bad light on your father. I find it incredibly strange that the father was not named by your mother and there could be many reasons for that. There must be a plausible explanation as to why she would rather not remember the past.

As you are well aware cutting out the father of anyone's life is going to have a major impact in one way or another. Try and learn your mother's motives to find out why she did what she did.

I hope you get reunited with your father or with your father's family soon.

Naku noa na Tane te Ariki

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 6:52 pm
mariapia OWC
(@mariapia-owc)
Active Member

Thank you all for your kind words!

I am sending my mother a letter today - with all the questions I never asked before....lets see if she is willing to give me some answerers. I feel like this is a great adventure and my motto is that nothing is impossible, it just takes longer!

I feel like have tried everything with her, there is not anything in her past that could change my views of her. maybe I am just another generation?

my swedish family loves family tracing and we have been able to trace our swedish roots back to 1593, mainly due to church archives. we have had a big family reunion and it was so much fun!

Thank you all and if you have any advice or tips or anything regarding this please let me know!

it is better to regreat things we have done in our past than to regreat to have done nothing...

donna

ReplyQuote
Posted : 01 March, 2008 9:40 pm
ngati_kuri@hotmail.com OWC
(@ngati_kurihotmail-com-owc)
Eminent Member

Any help from me also offered even if you get an area and an idea how old he was in your birth year. 2008 is a great year to start casting out your net. Divine intervention is a sure bet as Steve mentions above. His blood, sweat and tears effort and dogged perseverence has obviously been blessed and paid off. Good job well done!! You already have contact with your birth mother which is 50% of the battle. Email me ngati_kuri@hotmail.com if you need some 'non public' dialogue.

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 10:20 pm
ngati_kuri@hotmail.com OWC
(@ngati_kurihotmail-com-owc)
Eminent Member

A maori father now how many 'Swedes' have one of them I wonder??

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 10:22 pm
mariapia OWC
(@mariapia-owc)
Active Member

Not many I think! In the south of Sweden where I live there is a lof of australians and very often young kiwi people passing by....swedish people loves New Zealand and the maori people, if you ask people where they would go for a dreamvacation New Zealand is always nr 1, Australia nr 2...

not to many maori people over here - I think I have met one, a lady who is married to a swedish guy 🙂 they actually wrote an article about her!

ReplyQuote
Posted : 01 March, 2008 10:33 pm
ngati_kuri@hotmail.com OWC
(@ngati_kurihotmail-com-owc)
Eminent Member

Were you adopted in Australia to Swedes? Did you get you birth documents when you turned 18?

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Posted : 01 March, 2008 10:48 pm
mariapia OWC
(@mariapia-owc)
Active Member

I was born in Australia - I used ISS ( International Social Services ) when I felt ready to trace my past back in 1995. They tracked my mother down, contacted her and she contacted me. If she didnt want to have contact with me I would never have been able to get in touch.

In Sweden we have a much more public approach to these things, almost every record is public. When it comes to adoption/fosterparents the rules are set to give the child ALL the rights. Not in every case but very often. All archives from churches and other records are on the net and family tracing is very important. Also ( I have noticed ) one cant change your own name as you might do in NZ or Australia. Or was this just in the past?

Of course I know some background to my mothers past, the first thing she said when I called her back 1996 - you do know you are maori!? She was so proud....and then nothing?

As my swedish family is very open and honest about everything, I have always known that I was adopted and that I was maori. I remember my dat showing me books of New Zealand and maori people at a very young age. I felt very special growing up and for that I will always be grateful. To know that there are people far away looking like me feels strange....

It is not only my birht father I am tracing, it is the whole family background. History and past, culture annd future. I am claiming my birthright!

donna

ReplyQuote
Posted : 02 March, 2008 12:23 am
ngati_kuri@hotmail.com OWC
(@ngati_kurihotmail-com-owc)
Eminent Member

And with the offer of support from your whanaunga (wider family members) here we will be there for you when you come home to stand on your turangawaewae (your place of standing) and you feel the soil under your feet. Then you will know you are grounded and at home (comfortable) with who you are.

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Posted : 02 March, 2008 1:34 am
mariapia OWC
(@mariapia-owc)
Active Member

Thank you so much!

I need an extended family in this case. An extra pair of eyes and certainly a great network as this will help me forward. I am not standing alone and none of you either!

The area my mother lives in is Christchurch.
You can also email me privatly;
donna.carlsson@comhem.se

or I am also on facebook;
donna carlsson

donna

ReplyQuote
Posted : 02 March, 2008 5:03 am
Ngamotu34
(@ngamotu34)
Eminent Member

We had success with the website CousinConnect NZ.Make sure when you do your posting that you put your mother's name(&/or your father's) and your year of birth, and area involved if possible. Good luck!

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Posted : 02 March, 2008 6:52 am
marywooderson
(@marywooderson)
Active Member

kia ora,my prayers go with you as you search for your whanau.Around the time you were born there was a strong possibility that your birth mother had actually travelled to Oz to have her baby as often it was considered a shame to have a baby out of wedlock in NZ especially in the 60s and very early 70s.If your mum wont give you any details that is a possibility.Have you met your kiwi family and is their a chance that another family member may be able to help with information.You could try putting a message in the NZ Herald asking for anyone having info of a child born to ,your mums first name only ,in name of the town or city Australia and the date.If you look like your Dad (though youd have to know what your mum looks like for this to work)maybe you could put a photo on a site similar to this asking if people recognise you.God be with you and know that by coming to this site you have definitely got a kick start in your search.Keep us in touch with how you are going,arohanui,Mary

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Posted : 25 March, 2008 12:42 am
marywooderson
(@marywooderson)
Active Member

as an addit to the above message this would also explain why your Dad's name was not listed.If he did not go with your mum to sign the birth certificate and as she was most likely not married to him she would not have been able to list him as the father.
Mary

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Posted : 25 March, 2008 12:57 am
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